Shooting Star

When it comes to firearms, there were those who doubted me — thought I couldn’t do it, admitted they could never imagine me holding a gun or hotly asserted that they would never let me near one (you know who you are). 

The neophile in me would never abide by such assumptions, especially as I’ve always had an inkling that I would be quite a remarkable marksman if given the opportunity. My recent trip to the U.S. provided just that  — the chance to cross “shooting a gun” off my not-so-indentured bucket list.

So it was with great anticipation on an already hotly anticipated U.S. trip that I embarked on my first indoor open-fire experience led by my dear friend and fellow shooting neophyte Linda. On that fateful day of July 18, we made our way to Target Masters West in Milpitas, CA, resulting in one of the most peculiar highlights of my West Coast trip (don’t get me started on the Midwest…that will come later).

Prior to takeoff, I had called to make sure that as a non-U.S. citizen, I could enjoy equally the American right to bear arms. The precaution seemed necessary, as someone had explicitly warned me on the strict gun laws of the state of California. Not to worry; the dude was cool with it, as long as the Californian Linda was willing to vouch for me. This involved her signing a bunch of papers confirming that I was neither despondent nor suicidal (“Are you?” she asked, then cowered at my deathstare). After that, the guy behind the counter gave us the Gun Safety 101 rundown, and we were off…free to experience the famed 2nd Amendment.

So how did I fare? Did I cave to those doubters or were they forced to eat their own briny words? Find out for yourself…

Lost and Found and Restored again

Yesterday, I almost went to the police office to file a report.

Thank goodness the trek did not happen, but had I gone, the report probably would’ve looked something like this:

Missing: Lydia Lin’s iPhone 4

Physical description: like any iPhone 4, but encased in black high-quality silicon diamond-pattern case cut to glitter at every angle.

Time/location of disappearance: …. (best left unsaid in case accidentally incriminate self)

iPhone status: silent

Number of calls made to iPhone after disappearance: 10 — one from friend (Min), one from design desk guy still hanging around the office at 12:50 a.m. (Carey?), 8 from home.

Number of replies to calls: 0

Number of text messages sent to iPhone from Dad’s iPhone 3G: 1

Text description/content:

我是這手機的主人。如果你好心把手機還我，我會給你好的回報，包括金錢。 (I am the owner of this cell phone. If you would kindly return it to me, I will surely reward you, including monetarily.)　

Number of replies to text: 0

Time of call to Chunghua Telecom to suspend service: 1:30 a.m.

Type of service suspension: Yes incoming/No outgoing

Time between disappearance and decision to file report: less than 24 hours (not 31 days, phew)

Time it took to locate phone without dispatching police:less than 24 hours 

Involvement of “Find My iPhone” app in locating iPhone: None 

Features used on “Find My iPhone” app from Dad’s iPhone 3G: Display Message or Play Sound, Remote Lock , Remote Wipe (all sent around 1:45 a.m., July 11.). 

Number of ”Find My iPhone” app features that worked within 20 minutes of activation: 0 

Number of suspected iPhone thieves/Physical description: Two young Taiwanese men, laughing, talking, and walking a little too close our sitting area — twice.

Number of hours envisioning life without iPhone: 15

Plan B if iPhone is lost forever: Use Dad’s iPhone 3G (downgrade, swallow pride, kiss video feature/high-resolution pics goodbye). Buy first iPad. Wait for iPhone 5. Resume identity as Luddite.

Number of email sent to friends re: iPhone status: 2

First mass email content:

Hello,

Just letting you know that my iPhone was lost/possibly stolen last night. I’m in the process of trying to retrieve it, although the odds are against me. In the meantime, if you need to contact me, just use email for now.

Thanks for your time,

Lydia

(sent: 2:45 p.m., July 11)

Most sympathetic reply: 

“O man, that sucks…hope you find it soon!! ” –AmL.

“Oh crap! What happened Lydia, that’s terrible news?! I hope you find it, but did you have insurance?” –JT.

Least sympathetic reply: 

“…………….MY GOD…not again…..” –Nanayin

Most presumptuous reply (helpful but unknowing):

“I take it you didn’t install the find my iPhone app…” –JC.

Breaking reply:

“Lydia you left your phone in my bag! Will return it to you at work.” –Min 

Number of times swatted by Mom on head: 3

Number of times asked Min if she was sure and it was actually MY iPhone: 3

Min’s response 1 & 2:

“no, i just happen to have half a dozen of iPhones hanging out in my bag”

“NO I JUST HAPPEN TO HAVE A COUPLE OF SPARE IPHONES LYING AROUND geez”

Second mass email content:

Thanks everyone for your concern!

The iPhone has been found in mint condition; the fastest case solved in less than 24 hours. My number shall resume service shortly.

In case you were wondering, I did install “Find my iPhone,” and was unable to locate it through the app. If you must know, I accidentally left it in the cavernous bag of my friend

Have a great day!

Lydia

(4:33 p.m., July 11)

Most “rejoice with those who are rejoicing” reply:

“Cool, good news!” –JT.

Most misplaced joy reply:

“Gee… Lydia!! LOL good thing your iPhone had that awesome app!!” –GY.

“Do you remember XXX? She lost her mobile phone and purse exactly the same way you nearly did. Anyway, she found her stuff too! Just shows how much integrety the general population of Taiwan have. If we were in China, we’d have no chance!” –DK.

Most sarcastically joyous reply:

“Wow your friends bag is so big it has no reception… Nice -.-” glad u found it” –JC.

Time reunited with iPhone: 6:50 p.m. July 11.

Remaining iPhone battery: 5%

Time reactivate iPhone service: 11: 00 p.m. (time discrepancy explanation: was watching an amazing orchestra concert and secretly taping it with newly reunited iPhone)

Time “Find My iPhone” Alert popped up on-screen: 11:28 p.m.

Time “Find My iPhone” Remote Wipe commenced: 11:28 p.m.

Number of video footage wiped from iPhone: countless (including illegal concert video footage)

Value of video footage wiped from iPhone: priceless

Value of returned iPhone: … at a price

Time to restore/synch iPhone: too long

Number of innocent victims accused: 2

Number of parents who believed your iPhone was stolen: 0

Number of parents who believed you lost your iPhone and claimed it was stolen: 2

Number of parents who were right: 0 (yeahy!)

Conclusion: iPhone returned. No one was hurt. Case closed.

Sports: To Quidditch or not to Quidditch?

One too many technological musings have made this more “Luddite of Life” than “Lux,” hence I’ve decided to shake things up and shift the topic outdoors, to greener pastures rippled by heaven’s bellows.

The term ”outdoors” for most is synonymous with physical activity. I find that the older you get, the harder it is to stay physical without having it become a chore. Furthermore, age appears to limit the number of sports in which it seems appropriate for one to partake. I say “seems” because most sports are doable well into mid-life, yet some just appear…a little funny, more gawk-worthy appearance-wise than others.   

One such sport is the emergent campus phenomenon of “Quidditch.” If you are part of the Harry-Potter-Saga-reading demographic, you know this well and would never make the mistake of spelling it “Quittage,” as I did in an email, only to realize later that it would indeed be daft of J.K. Rowling to christen a nouveau sport with the least conducive name possible to raising team morale.   

The aforementioned email exchange was with my friend and fellow Emerson College alumna Grace, who kindly enlightened me that our alma mater is now known for taking their Quiddtch games very, very seriously. 

While I loved my experience at ”Home of the Hipster” Emerson (I was an outsider, believe me), there was still a semblance of normality during my four-year tenure. Now, there are “Snitches” running around the Boston Commons in lieu of sprawled-out girls with over-sized sunglasses and fake pearl necklaces smoking (I forget what brand) cigs.   

As someone who has never read a Harry Potter in her life (don’t judge. It’s very easy not to. Just like it’s easier not to pick up the tomes of the Lord of the Rings than it is reading them back to back), I will not attempt to explain the rules. What I do know is that flying is not a prerequisite (make-believe, on the other hand, is) and am cognizant that there exists an International Quidditch Association.

So without further ado, let’s look at the pictures my friend so graciously supplied. Behold, the revenge of the Wizards…

Christmas-colored uniforms, Michael Cera-era headbands (knee socks optional)…this almost looks like a legitimate sport. However, I am one broom from being swept away.

The intensity is written all over his face. The poor dear…

That definitely looks like a foul. I must compose an email of concern to Umpire Commissaire J.K. Rowling herself.

Okay, it doesn’t look so bad, but this is precisely the type of sport where if you don’t pick up a broom at an impressionable age, you never will. I do have one, very real question: is Harry Potter readership mandatory for participation? Will the designated game organizer sigh impatiently and refer me to “Harry Potter and the Deathly Philosopher’s Goblet-stone” if I ask them to repeat the rules of the game?

The main thing about hipsters in general and Emerson College in particular is to be completely earnest in your perpetual irony. I see some things haven’t changed, but the world as I know it has grown all the more distant.

In homage to some time-honored sports/physical activities that allow you to engage with aging dignity, I made a few light videos with my iPhone 4 (through the Windows Movie Maker because Steve Jobs hates my Adobe Premiere Pro, hence the new “WeBreatheArt Production” logo, as you will soon see). Below are a few acceptable exercises for those who have crossed into the 25-35 survey bracket:

Don’t ever forget tennis:

Or say hello to tango!

[disclaimer: I do not tango, but was able to see first-hand, its merit and ancient influence]

If all else fails, there’s always Bijou’s prefered sport of choice:

So in conclusion, to Quidditch or not to Quidditch? Sadly, the majority of us should just quittage while we’re ahead…

iPhone 3G, I hardly knew thee!

A recent occurence unbeknownst to the rest of the world is “The Great Cell-phone Swap of 2011,” during which a telecommunications upheaval at the Lin household resulted in a curious case of hand-me-downs ironically transferred from the bottom up. 

Technology, like a college matriculate, is constantly reinventing itself, a side effect of which is the upgrading of gadgetry that has left many cast-off models in the palms of the less dexterous. The cell phone is a prime example. The advent of the “smart” touch-screen phone has rendered all other models “obtuse.” It has come to the point where a mobile phone for purely telephony purposes are few and far between. 

Long story short, I became on March 23rd  the owner of a new iPhone 4, passing onto my father, my iPhone 3G prototype (which served only iPod Touch purposes due to un-jailbreakable reasons that cleared itself up), and my mom, my battered Nokia with the “Dès que j’te vois” ringtone.

This was kind of a big deal, as I’m strictly a “laggard” in marketing terms. My iPhone 3G-owner friend said it best when she found out I had somehow upgraded her: “I would not want to be your phone.”

The new phone is doing fine, thank you very much. Yet before I go into the fun I’m having with it, I must first commemorate the predecessor I barely got to know during my short 3G ownership. 

It was actually a 3G prototype model. My dear cousin Nanayin (check out her wildly popular blog. Note: Chinese-language reading ability required) received it as a wedding present from a friend whose husband worked at Apple. A series of serendipitous events took place (my 1st generation Nano broke, she got an iPhone 4) and Nanayin decided her old smart phone was mine, if I wanted it. I remember dreaming about it the night before the pick up. It was that monumental.

What ensued were some truly magical moments with my first touch-screen device. Below are unadulterated 3G captures of a family trip to Taiping Mountain last month:

Look at that! So “Lord of the Rings!” And I’m not even a fan of the trilogy… 

For critics of the blurry quality, I can only pull a Grace Coddington and say, “It’s supposed to be out of focus!”

As you can see from above, the sub-par “zoom” feature failed to dampen my family’s enthusiasm for artistic, reflection-centered portraits.

The 3G awakened something from within. Please note that I have never been a “picture” person— no snapshots of funny-looking food, no enthused group rally for peace-signs and toothpick smiles—but there’s something different about snapping pictures with an iPhone, an act that somehow appears more spontaneously inspired than the tourist-esque wielding of a digital camera.

Sadly, due to local cell phone plans, two-year binding contracts and free phone upgrades, it was somehow more cost-efficient to purchase a new iPhone 4. The rest is telecommunications history. 

So I’ve discovered the picture quality is better. And it has video. I recreated earlier 3G pictures I took of my pug Bijou with the iPhone 4. Can you tell which one is which?

Oh, technology. You can really see the quality difference in the pics below, taken in my visual zeal for reflections and their illusionary, multi-dimensional effect.

(iPhone 3G) At the intersection of Chungshan N. Rd and Mingchuan W. Rd. 

(iPhone 4) At the wig shop in the Xinyi area next to Smith & Hsu.

So goodbye iPhone 3G…you are in good hands, albeit ones less appreciative of your features and quirks. It was amazing while it lasted.

The advent of vanity music videos

The hoopla surrounding a 13-year-old girl (who shall not be named) making the rounds in U.S. media outlets for making a terribly inane but completely harmless music video made me think of all those talented artists getting far less (though much more deserved) name recognition.

Granted, these “artists” I refer to also happen to be my friends, many of whom have taken to sites like kickstarter.com to raise funds for their first albums or music videos. As a “backer” excitedly awaiting her “perks,” I am all for artists eager to showcase their talent on Youtube, especially those who do care about production value and enhancing viewer experience.

As one of her kickstarter “perks,” my friend Anna Haas promised to make music videos of any song request for her more significant backers. Fulfilling one supporter’s wish is her cover of Al Green’s “Take Me to the River.” 

 

I love how New York artists help each other out. One of the lovely backup dancers is Charlene Kaye, a fellow musician who released her own, official video a while back. Watch out for the artist crossover (Anna also choreographed everything):



Which brings me to my most recent work of art: a one-day filming/video-editing project for my friend Christina, who wanted to gift her boyfriend with a special birthday repertoire. The mastermind behind the whole concept, Christina is also in charge of the music and creative direction. Somehow between now and the launch of my blog, I have become this go-to person for video editing…

Can you believe that didn’t cost us a thing?

A New Day

What to say for my first blog post ever?

What is passé for most is a huge step for a luddite like me, although it’s time I overcome my fear of technology by attempting to raise through this blog, my Pew Research Millennial quiz score from its Baby Boomer comfort zone. Facebook is still out of the question…yes, baby steps! But it’s doubtful I’ll ever make it there… 

Welcome to Lux of Life! 

In other firsts, I made my premier Premiere Pro video, a postmodernist short entitled, “In Search of Mangroves.” Like the Chinese New Year trip on which it was based, it’s a little rough.

Enjoy~